5: Gram's

I went to my Gram's house today, just like I always do every couple weeks. I enjoy the food very much, but I have a lack of things to do. It's not like it was when I was a little kid, back then, I had toys to play with and older cousins to look up to. Now I just sit around and listen to my aunts, uncles, and older cousins talk. It's quite boring really, and I feel bad for not being the older cousin to my cousin's kids like how my cousins were for me, but I just can't do it. Being the child of the youngest child doesn't give much more family to look forward to.

So, while sitting around in my boredom, I started thinking about things. I realized that I shouldn't care who my ex dates at all, it's none of my business, and I'm only making myself look like a psychopath. Obviously he didn't care about me enough if he let me go that easily. He probably lied every time he told me that he loved me. I must not have been special enough to him at all, so why should I bother trying to plot his demise? Sure, I was jealous when I found out he's dating my ex-best friend, because I hate her, but I realized that hating both of them and trying to make them fail as a couple is a total waste of my time. Besides, if I keep wallowing in my misery and jealousy, no one would want to date me. So, I'm giving up in my evil plot to destroy them both, and accept that they're a couple and that they "love" eachother, even if I don't approve of it, because obviously, my opinion doesn't matter. (Plus, those fuckers deserve eachother.)

So now, I'm going to be positive, and celebrate the fact that I'm a single woman. If I like someone, I can say so, because there's no "boyfriend troubles" to tie me down anymore. I know that it's been "over" for months, but I think I've finally opened my eyes to the cold hard truth, and now I'm actually happy. It's about time I moved on, and I will.